7. Defining Moments of Resilience: Dealing With Challenges and Hardship
“INSTEAD OF LETTING YOUR HARDSHIPS AND FAILURES DISCOURAGE OR EXHAUST YOU, LET THEM INSPIRE YOU. LET THEM MAKE YOU EVEN HUNGRIER TO SUCCEED.”
– MICHELLE OBAMA
Dealing With Challenges & Hardship:
We all endure difficulties from time to time, but some of us thrive in adversity while others struggle to get out of bed in the morning. Successful people have figured out how to overcome impediments and hurdles that stop others. People face a variety of challenges throughout their lives. Personal experiences include disease, the death of a loved one, abuse, bullying, job loss, and financial insecurity. It is always so astonishing to see the resilience of people during tragic incidents, such as terrorist attacks, mass shootings, and natural disasters. People learn to cope with and work through challenging life situations. According to resilience theory, adversity, change, loss, and danger are all factors people are influenced by and adapt to.
The Source: Resilient people do not live without stress, emotional turmoil, or suffering. Some individuals confuse resilience with mental toughness, but resilience also entails overcoming emotional anguish and suffering. Resilience is a learned skill. Changing specific beliefs and habits can help people tap into their resilience through flexibility, adaptability, and tenacity. According to research, students who believe that resilience strategies can enhance intellectual and social qualities have a reduced stress response to adversity and do better. Life can be full of problems, setbacks, curveballs, and other significant challenges. Money issues, school issues, job issues, family issues, relationship issues, legal issues... the list goes on and on. If we let these causes of stress get the best of us, it can be challenging to get out of the depression. However, getting through difficulties is critical to improving and moving forward with positivity and clarity.
The Spark: "When I was told that I have cancer, the diagnosis affected not only myself but also my family and friends. I felt scared, uncertain, and angry about the unwanted changes cancer will bring to my life and theirs. I felt numb and confused. I had trouble listening to, understanding, or remembering what people said during this time. This was especially true when my doctor told me I had cancer. I shut down mentally once I heard the word "cancer." Accepting the diagnosis and figuring out what cancer would mean in my young adult life was challenging. After I was diagnosed with cancer, I immediately started to feel a mix of emotions; shock, disbelief, fear, anxiety, guilt, sadness, grief, depression, anger, and more. That's why I decided to create a blog of video diaries each night to cope with the uncertainty. I am still trying to figure out how to care for my emotional needs as I continue to suffer from PTSD.
Some people might not know that the Chemo stripped all my counts down to zero, and I was in and out of the hospital for months. Just when I thought I was getting better, something happened, and I was back in the emergency room. They took blood cultures, x-rays, CT scans, and other samples, but they all returned the same "NEGATIVE." my immune system was like a newborn baby's, and I couldn't fight off any infection. Every time I had a fever, my status went to high alert. We went through this for two weeks with the same result. Then on a Sunday, around 4 PM, the nurse took my temperature and said, "99.6." We both looked at each other and smiled. I didn't get too excited because I had been down that road before, and I knew that I could spike another fever in a matter of minutes. But not this time…this time was different. Every temp taken after that was down in the normal range and has stayed that way. All I could do was thank God. My counts are now in full recovery mode and have improved daily. Things are looking up!"
~M. Stubbs
The Strategy: Everyone handles problems differently, and various struggles necessitate different tactics. However, there are specific strategies for motivating yourself to overcome obstacles. They assist in putting things into perspective and illuminating the end of the tunnel. Life is difficult for everyone, regardless of popularity, money, or ability. However, you have control over how you respond to such challenges. Personal progress and peace of mind result from dealing with problems in healthy, constructive ways. This information outlines four healthy, effective ways to deal with life's challenges:
- Reducing overthinking
- Focusing on your strengths
- Prioritizing self-care
- Finding meaning in your experiences
When issues develop in our lives, it is natural to turn within to find solutions that would alleviate the discomfort and sadness that the problems cause. However, the longer you think about a situation or circumstance, the more unhappy and worried you will get, and the less likely you will find a solution. Furthermore, overthinking has been shown to impair problem-solving abilities, sap drive, and maintain or increase emotions of sorrow. It's not always easy to appreciate when we're amidst our actual challenges — losing a job, going through a divorce, fighting with our children, or suffering from health issues. Fear and anxiety paralyze us in those situations, stopping us from taking the necessary steps to get out of the hole. However, we indeed discover who we are in the face of adversity. The key to conquering obstacles is to lean into fear and find the strength and energy to act in direct opposition to the forces holding you back.
Long before I knew or heard the word resilient used to describe my actions, I tapped into my reliance reservoir, putting the above habits into practice. I grew up in poverty during the 80s on the east side of Cleveland during The Crack Epidemic. While most of us commonly associate the crack era with California and Boyz n the Hood or New York and the infamous movie New Jack City. Life for me in Cleveland was not a far cry from the most heinous scene you can think of in either of those movies. Life is rarely perfect, and sometimes it's wildly chaotic. Life is always beautiful. Explore the strategies above and let me know how it went in the comments below. I hope you will continue to join me monthly for these chats, and maybe one day, we can all "dream of never being called resilient again."
The Catalyst Coach
.png)
Comments
Post a Comment